Movesets
As a perfectionist collector, can anybody tell me/recommend me the best site to check the best attack and defence move sets. Reason I ask is Pogomoves.com is severely different to this one, surely there must be a common ground??
Answers
There's a best attacker and defender option too. The best moveset is arguable and depends on your school of thought. And as Niantic has done so in the past, moves and stats can be changed willy nilly and make or break movesets.
The whole point of movesets IS battling. If there was no battling, no one would care what moveset it came with. It would be as arbitrary as height and weight.
Keep in mind that sites like these are only calculating pure "stand and fight" DPS, and don't take dodging into account. There's no way you can tell me that Confusion - Future Sight Alakazam is the best pokemon for attacking right now -- maybe for like 15 seconds before it gets killed during the confusion cooldown.
Take these rankings with a grain of salt, because all they represent is a theoretical DPS calculation -- not necessarily what performs best in real life gym battles.
In the past...
I relied on an excel spreadsheet prepared by, Professor_Kukui, a user on Reddit. The spreadsheet gives accurate quantitative info on pure DPS rankings for move sets, calculated with the assumption that you attack without dodging, and that you weave quick and charge attacks for max damage.
For qualitative info, I relied on GamePress. GamePress assigns "grades" to move sets based on utility, in addition to pure DPS. Factors such as move type, move speed, ease of dodging, the current "gym scene", and so on, are considered.
A grade "A" move set on GamePress that is also ranked #1 in the aforementioned spreadsheet is what I consider a "perfect" move set.
Both sources are outdated at this time, you will have to wait.
I dont think they did the qualitative part to what you explained at all. They just took the cycle/weave vs a 100 def mon. It works to an extent, but is not perfect.
everything really depends on how YOU battle - and even then rankings aren't perfect as there is also human efficiency and error - among other things.